business, design, Life

Closeups and Cameras

I don’t feel like I am ready to do a photo shoot.  I feel vulnerable in front of a camera.  Despite my confidence on stage when I speak or when I conduct training with a group my old demons of being a teenager comes out.

CDR_08252017_0467_photo with JM alumni color_logo

The sad story of a girl with a disability never had dates, never went to the prom, didn’t deserve to have straight teeth – “Who would want to marry or even date her?” I was constantly bullied in the shadows or whispers.

When someone in college said I was pretty, I gravitated towards that and was taken advantage of again and again and again. I finally let go of all that stress on the day I was married. No more being judged, no more being criticized but it didn’t stop. The criticisms never end because the voices from the past keep coming back like a ghost.

Now I look at my wrinkles and my fat and thank God for Photoshop. Then again, should I show you what I look like with all my flaws?  I’m already teetering on one leg with crutches in front of you.

Despite all of my flaws, I am content.  I am in a career I love.  I have jewelry and a clothing business that gives back to families and nonprofits. I love my husband, kids, dog, house, church, community (Mililani), networking groups (especially BNI), clients, etc.  I have so much to be grateful for.  That may show up in the photos and that may not.  I know that this contentment is in my heart.

If you have a chance, please check out my jewelry boutique. https://www.chloeandisabel.com/boutique/vince

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I’m only a $1000 away from earning a trip to Paris.  I’ve never been out of the country. You can help me get to Paris.  Share my page and of course purchasing any jewelry pieces.  Think of Valentine’s Day!

The sales of jewelry, clothing, training, or coaching helps to keep this contentment. Thank you so much for your support and purchase!

Next blog: Tie Your Roots

business, Life

One Foot in Front of No Other

Has anyone heard the song “One Foot” by Walk The Moon? http://www.walkthemoonband.com/#music-and-video-page

I changed the lyrics just a little to relate it to my situation.  I love the lyrics….  The song popped up while I was deciding to leave a job that sucked the life out of me and struggling to create a business from nothing.

I sing it to myself when I feel down or when I have that win for the day.  I love to pull a James Corden Carpool Karaoke session in my car.  You will see me on the H1 belting out the song. I have another song to set me up for speaking engagements.  That’s for another blog, another day.

My wonderful husband, Nick, has helped me to start this journey to begin to build this business.  He has been so incredibly supportive and continued to be my rock. All we have is each other. He’s got my back through this wilderness.

I don’t know what it’s like to have one foot in front of the other. I’ve had a prosthetic leg three times in my life and hated each one of them.  I don’t have one now because the entire prosthetic attaches to my body.  I don’t have a left hip and the brace would come up to my chest.  Just picture a tiny little Filipino girl carrying around a clunky, hot, itchy, and incredibly heavy object. The combination of an active person and a 30 lb. weight strapped to you does not make a great combination. I had to swing my whole body to get the leg to move an inch. Sometimes I took 30 minutes to a class that would normally take 5 minutes. I hope that answers why I don’t wear a prosthetic leg.

My life on my own terms. The phrase one foot in front of no other forces me to keep moving.  I will walk with my crutches, hop, or wheel my way forward. I will get there one foot in front of no other.

 

 

Life

Balance

I used to balance on one leg for a longer period time. I would say around 16-20 minutes. I was able to hold 2 kids and grab keys and a bag.  Now I can barely stand on one leg for a minute.

I overdid it. But did I?  I think I would have made that same sacrifice everyday to hold my children again.

Balance is a tough subject in anyone’s life.  I have to admit sometimes I gave too much to the job and neglected my family, I also sacrificed my career to raise my kids, and this time I am pushing myself to create a business and have a lot of health issues to address.  I wish I could take the pie and divide it equally throughout  the day.  I realize now that there is this dance between career, family, faith, friends, health, self development and community.

Areas of my life will pop up and remind me that I have neglected that part of my life.  Balance takes a lot of skill.  Can you balance all areas of your life? I believe you can and if life doesn’t seem in balance then recalculate and readjust until you find that balance.